I read Hosea last night. VERY interesting book. I was particularly struck by the prophet calling out the priests and leaders for their complicity in leading their people away from God into spiritual whoredom. How the priests had decided that their war machines could protect them better than God. How they thought that their ways were better than what God had taught them.
I thought about how the "christian" leaders with the biggest voices tend to teach that war against the infidel is holy and that their way is the only way to God even though they ignore so much of what I read in Scripture. One verse talked about how self-satisfied the priests were with their performance ( my interpretation, not the words used ) and how much God loathed what they were doing. Another place talked about offerings that just meant the priests ate. Humpf. Sounds like name-it-and-claim-it people who coerce people into giving all they have so they can live well but the people can't pay their bills.
I combined that reading with something I heard in a sermon ( 87% of people 18-35 hear the word "christian" and think "self-righteous" ) and was concerned with how much of a role I've played in being one of those priests who thinks they're pleasing God but isn't living out God's teachings. Not that I'm a priest, but still...
The ones who are teaching things that sit well in my soul are mostly those who are looked at as not being theologically correct enough by the priests and leaders of our day. Yet they are the ones I hear teaching what I'm reading in Scripture.
I think I'll go with the ones thought to be on the edge of orthodoxy and ignore the ones who are loud and consider themselves "right".
Monday, November 23, 2009
Friday, July 10, 2009
Appropriate prayer places
I believe in prayer. Absolutely! I even believe in rebuking demons. Truly! But there's a time and a place for it. In the middle of the hallway in a psych unit is not one of them. Well-intentioned, of course, but totally inappropriate.
When are Christian leaders and teachers going to explain to their followers proper behavior? Things like doing things in proper order (like knowing the person before deciding all of their problems are demonic) and in the proper place (in a quiet place without an audience). Perhaps ensuring that the people putting what they're being taught into practice actually have good motives.
One of the lessons I learned when I was busy doing deliverance ministry was that I often operated more out of a need to feel in control of something than for the well-being of another person. Not all the time. And there was always an underlying concern for the other person. But, after watching a totally inappropriate situation this week, I had an "aha!" moment and realized it was all about feeling powerless and trying to find some power. If you can just command demons to leave a sick person, then you have power. When your loved one is making bad decisions and ends up with some physically based mental health issues, you want to make them better right away. YOU want to be the one to help them heal. So you grab your God-gun and start shooting. Unfortunately it often just makes things worse.
It's time that Christians stop to think and pray before going off half-cocked and afraid.
When are Christian leaders and teachers going to explain to their followers proper behavior? Things like doing things in proper order (like knowing the person before deciding all of their problems are demonic) and in the proper place (in a quiet place without an audience). Perhaps ensuring that the people putting what they're being taught into practice actually have good motives.
One of the lessons I learned when I was busy doing deliverance ministry was that I often operated more out of a need to feel in control of something than for the well-being of another person. Not all the time. And there was always an underlying concern for the other person. But, after watching a totally inappropriate situation this week, I had an "aha!" moment and realized it was all about feeling powerless and trying to find some power. If you can just command demons to leave a sick person, then you have power. When your loved one is making bad decisions and ends up with some physically based mental health issues, you want to make them better right away. YOU want to be the one to help them heal. So you grab your God-gun and start shooting. Unfortunately it often just makes things worse.
It's time that Christians stop to think and pray before going off half-cocked and afraid.
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Heresy
What exactly *is* heresy?
I've been called a heretic. I laughed because I know I am far from being heretical. I'm far too "into" God to be a heretic. Are heretics constantly listening for God's voice? Studying the Bible or reading books about the Bible or listening to podcasts about the Bible? Maybe. Maybe I really am a heretic. But I don't think so.
I was reading about someone who has been called a heretic. Nothing I have heard or read about him jived with the "heretic" label for me. The person who started the whole "he's a heretic!" blather comes across, to me, as more than a little skewed. Not sure he's a heretic but he's not completely orthodox in his behavior.
I tend to look at the fruit I see in a person. What is their behavior? Is it consistent with what they say they believe? No one is 100% consistent, but generally.... Do they show God's love toward others, particularly those they don't like? Not just the fake-y "christian" *love* that they're supposed to show but the real, gut-level, here's-the-rent-cuz-you-need-it-don't-tell-anyone-where-you-got-it kind of love?
Some of the people who are currently being labelled as "heretics" tend to be the ones that I find the most real. Weird. As I read and pray and ponder, I begin to wonder if the heretics aren't closer to God than the "orthodox" preachers who are lambasting them.
Maybe heresy isn't all that bad, depending on who is doing the labeling.
I've been called a heretic. I laughed because I know I am far from being heretical. I'm far too "into" God to be a heretic. Are heretics constantly listening for God's voice? Studying the Bible or reading books about the Bible or listening to podcasts about the Bible? Maybe. Maybe I really am a heretic. But I don't think so.
I was reading about someone who has been called a heretic. Nothing I have heard or read about him jived with the "heretic" label for me. The person who started the whole "he's a heretic!" blather comes across, to me, as more than a little skewed. Not sure he's a heretic but he's not completely orthodox in his behavior.
I tend to look at the fruit I see in a person. What is their behavior? Is it consistent with what they say they believe? No one is 100% consistent, but generally.... Do they show God's love toward others, particularly those they don't like? Not just the fake-y "christian" *love* that they're supposed to show but the real, gut-level, here's-the-rent-cuz-you-need-it-don't-tell-anyone-where-you-got-it kind of love?
Some of the people who are currently being labelled as "heretics" tend to be the ones that I find the most real. Weird. As I read and pray and ponder, I begin to wonder if the heretics aren't closer to God than the "orthodox" preachers who are lambasting them.
Maybe heresy isn't all that bad, depending on who is doing the labeling.
Monday, March 30, 2009
Natural Submissives
Some people are naturally giving, submissive people. It is imperative that people around them remain vigilant in being aware of how you treat them, This is especially true in churches where it's so easy to overwhelm a naturally submissive person into doing the grunt work of the church. If there are one or two people in the church doing a lot of the work, there is something sick and silently abusive in that church. (Naturally giving and submissive people are not necessarily meek and quiet. We can be quite rambunctious! ) Jesus was a giving, submissive person who stood up for himself when it was appropriate (ie clearing the moneychangers) or submitting to the needs of the world (ie the Cross). Naturally submissive people are good at the submitting to the needs of the world while totally ignoring their own needs. They often need help emulating Jesus' ability to stand up for Himself and protect Himself. They need to be allowed to say "no" and not be coerced into doing more stuff.
I think church pastors and elders need to be particularly aware of natural submissives in their congregations, adult and children. Some adults are in excellent marriages with partners who work hard to help them find their "no" and own it. Those submissives are people that are a joy to watch. Some have been snatched up by abusers who have the form of "good Christians" and are being quietly and systematically used in abusive ways. Just because someone (male or female) seems like a wonderful person does not mean that they are not abusive to those with a bent toward submission. It's important that people in the church be aware of the undertones to personal interactions between spouses, families, and church workers.
Natural submissives often love God very deeply. It is natural for us to be willing to do whatever the Lord wants us to do. We can be very wise and knowledgable, or not. We are not stupid. We have a blind spot that we need help seeing, just as every person in the Body of Christ has their own blind spots where they need loving brothers and sisters to help them be aware of when they are going too far in one direction. For far too long the church has turned a blind eye to natural submissives' blind spot and allowed us to be abused. Some in the church have made natural submissives into martyrs rather than realize that their "martyrdom" is actually sin that needs to be confronted not exploited.
It's taken me a long time to realize my nature and come to grips with how to deal in healthy ways in relationships, including churches. I've spent the last 6+ years not being involved in church work at all because I know it's dangerous for me. It's not wrong for me to be submissive. I'm also not some extra-holy saint because I am. Just as people with the gift of mercy need to be aware of the negative ways that trait can be used or those with the gift of administration can unknowingly twist it into negative behaviors, I have a gift that has negative consequences if I'm not careful, aware, and always listening to God's voice rather than the voices of the people around me.
Being a naturally submissive person is not a spiritual gift. It is a natural characteristic of who a person is. My spiritual gifts are not mercy and helps and service. Those are natural characteristics of my personality. My spiritual gifts cluster around the “pastoral” gifts: preaching, teaching, exhortation, wisdom, knowledge. A natural submissive, given the proper boundaries and channeling their submissive personality correctly, could be an excellent pastor. There are some hurdles that a naturally dominant person wouldn’t have to deal with, but they’ve got other issues they need to deal with if they’re a pastor.
It is easy for me to fall into my natural self and submit to the physical needs of a church family. I’m in heaven if I get to cook huge meals to feed a lot of people. Churches who know that are apt to pigeon hole me into “kitchen work” and not bother to realize that my staying in that position is actually sinful for me. To do so occasionally, is fine, but it’s indulging my natural self and not using my spiritual gifts. To push myself into doing what God has called me to do, would be the correct thing to do. But it doesn’t fit many churches view of what a woman should do so they don’t bother to discover who I am in Christ’s Kingdom.
What is really sad about all of that is that there may be many other people in the church who are indulging their natural inclinations rather than doing the work the Lord has called them to do in the Body of Christ. What if someone is naturally dominant and is leading education classes when what they are actually called to do is be a greeter? How differently could the Body of Christ be affected if they were properly using their spiritual gifts? There are spiritual lessons that they are not learning, that may be very important for their spiritual development, because they’ve gone with their natural giftings rather than the spiritual gifts God gave them.
It is especially important that adults be aware of the natural inclinations of children. Naturally submissive children are easy prey for predators and abusers. Giving them the tools they need to be self-protective is important to help prevent their abuse. Naturally dominant children can easily become bullies and abusers, if they are not re-directed into other avenues of behavior. They need a different set of tools. What a blessing if the adults in a child’s life understand who each child is and helps them, individually, to become a healthy, happy adult able to connect safely with their world.
I think church pastors and elders need to be particularly aware of natural submissives in their congregations, adult and children. Some adults are in excellent marriages with partners who work hard to help them find their "no" and own it. Those submissives are people that are a joy to watch. Some have been snatched up by abusers who have the form of "good Christians" and are being quietly and systematically used in abusive ways. Just because someone (male or female) seems like a wonderful person does not mean that they are not abusive to those with a bent toward submission. It's important that people in the church be aware of the undertones to personal interactions between spouses, families, and church workers.
Natural submissives often love God very deeply. It is natural for us to be willing to do whatever the Lord wants us to do. We can be very wise and knowledgable, or not. We are not stupid. We have a blind spot that we need help seeing, just as every person in the Body of Christ has their own blind spots where they need loving brothers and sisters to help them be aware of when they are going too far in one direction. For far too long the church has turned a blind eye to natural submissives' blind spot and allowed us to be abused. Some in the church have made natural submissives into martyrs rather than realize that their "martyrdom" is actually sin that needs to be confronted not exploited.
It's taken me a long time to realize my nature and come to grips with how to deal in healthy ways in relationships, including churches. I've spent the last 6+ years not being involved in church work at all because I know it's dangerous for me. It's not wrong for me to be submissive. I'm also not some extra-holy saint because I am. Just as people with the gift of mercy need to be aware of the negative ways that trait can be used or those with the gift of administration can unknowingly twist it into negative behaviors, I have a gift that has negative consequences if I'm not careful, aware, and always listening to God's voice rather than the voices of the people around me.
Being a naturally submissive person is not a spiritual gift. It is a natural characteristic of who a person is. My spiritual gifts are not mercy and helps and service. Those are natural characteristics of my personality. My spiritual gifts cluster around the “pastoral” gifts: preaching, teaching, exhortation, wisdom, knowledge. A natural submissive, given the proper boundaries and channeling their submissive personality correctly, could be an excellent pastor. There are some hurdles that a naturally dominant person wouldn’t have to deal with, but they’ve got other issues they need to deal with if they’re a pastor.
It is easy for me to fall into my natural self and submit to the physical needs of a church family. I’m in heaven if I get to cook huge meals to feed a lot of people. Churches who know that are apt to pigeon hole me into “kitchen work” and not bother to realize that my staying in that position is actually sinful for me. To do so occasionally, is fine, but it’s indulging my natural self and not using my spiritual gifts. To push myself into doing what God has called me to do, would be the correct thing to do. But it doesn’t fit many churches view of what a woman should do so they don’t bother to discover who I am in Christ’s Kingdom.
What is really sad about all of that is that there may be many other people in the church who are indulging their natural inclinations rather than doing the work the Lord has called them to do in the Body of Christ. What if someone is naturally dominant and is leading education classes when what they are actually called to do is be a greeter? How differently could the Body of Christ be affected if they were properly using their spiritual gifts? There are spiritual lessons that they are not learning, that may be very important for their spiritual development, because they’ve gone with their natural giftings rather than the spiritual gifts God gave them.
It is especially important that adults be aware of the natural inclinations of children. Naturally submissive children are easy prey for predators and abusers. Giving them the tools they need to be self-protective is important to help prevent their abuse. Naturally dominant children can easily become bullies and abusers, if they are not re-directed into other avenues of behavior. They need a different set of tools. What a blessing if the adults in a child’s life understand who each child is and helps them, individually, to become a healthy, happy adult able to connect safely with their world.
Submission not Coercion
A friend posed a question about what I'd be interested in a pastor knowing about abuse and what I'd want to hear in a sermon. These are the immediate thoughts I had:
IMO authority figures need to be particularly careful when they are using their authority. That's why police and medical personnel and religious leaders and teachers are held to higher standards when they are interacting with others "under" them within their working environment. No one has the right to coerce another into doing what they want them to do. If they are coercing someone then that person is not really submitting to them, they are doing what they are doing to protect themselves from some type of harm. If someone who is in authority realizes that is what is happening they need to immediately stop, apologize to the person they were coercing, and *change their behavior*. Even if it means the church elders or pastor needs to apologize to the church for coercing them into faith promises or other financial giving by preying on their emotions!
I've learned to submit to someone's NEED rather than their want. If I'd understood the concept works for husbands as well as children (not saying husbands are children though) I'd probably have stayed with my husband until his death. Abusers need someone to stand up to them and say "NO! You cannot do that to me." It is only when they are faced with someone who can call them on their abusive behavior that they will back down. Just because someone has authority over another person does NOT give them the right to get whatever they want, whenever they want.
Unless submission is voluntary, it is not submission. Jesus does not coerce any of us into doing the Lord's will. If we are to be accurate reflections of Jesus, true Christians, we should not be coercing anyone into doing what we want. We need to reflect a God who loves and protects. God is not like the abusive parent, spouse, teacher, boss, Sunday School teacher, evangelist, or politician. God loves and gives willingly to us. God can be trusted because the LORD does not abuse us...ever.
IMO authority figures need to be particularly careful when they are using their authority. That's why police and medical personnel and religious leaders and teachers are held to higher standards when they are interacting with others "under" them within their working environment. No one has the right to coerce another into doing what they want them to do. If they are coercing someone then that person is not really submitting to them, they are doing what they are doing to protect themselves from some type of harm. If someone who is in authority realizes that is what is happening they need to immediately stop, apologize to the person they were coercing, and *change their behavior*. Even if it means the church elders or pastor needs to apologize to the church for coercing them into faith promises or other financial giving by preying on their emotions!
I've learned to submit to someone's NEED rather than their want. If I'd understood the concept works for husbands as well as children (not saying husbands are children though) I'd probably have stayed with my husband until his death. Abusers need someone to stand up to them and say "NO! You cannot do that to me." It is only when they are faced with someone who can call them on their abusive behavior that they will back down. Just because someone has authority over another person does NOT give them the right to get whatever they want, whenever they want.
Unless submission is voluntary, it is not submission. Jesus does not coerce any of us into doing the Lord's will. If we are to be accurate reflections of Jesus, true Christians, we should not be coercing anyone into doing what we want. We need to reflect a God who loves and protects. God is not like the abusive parent, spouse, teacher, boss, Sunday School teacher, evangelist, or politician. God loves and gives willingly to us. God can be trusted because the LORD does not abuse us...ever.
Thursday, March 12, 2009
The Shack
I've been thinking about this book and doing a lot of wondering. What if God truly loves each of us individually? What if that person that irritates me so much is just as beloved of God as I am? Do I have a right to disparage or denigrate that person?
What if the person who abuses another is trying to deal with issues from their past and have no other way in their "box of tricks" to get help? What if that abuse is actually a subconscious call for help? They are just as much the beloved of God as I am, so who am I to get up in arms over their behavior? Doesn't mean that they were right to do what they did or that they shouldn't face consequences but is it appropriate for me to get emotionally involved in lambasting their behavior? Can I take some time to see the person that God loves within that person?
What if the Beloved of God, say, one of my pagan friends, has been so badly mangled by "the church" that they've rejected "god" and gone looking for a Diety that loves and accepts them? What if the way that I've projected Christ to them doesn't help them get over the mangling they've experienced and what they find is more loving and accepting than the way I've treated them? Which "god" is more in line with our Loving God, their's or what I've portrayed?
What would happen if people would start seeing others around them as the Beloved of God and treating them as God would treat the Beloved? What if that happened in churches, workplaces, out shopping, on the roadways, in schools? What if Christians would treat non-Christians as the Beloved of God? Maybe people would be interested in the God that we talk about?
Just turning thoughts over in my mind...
What if the person who abuses another is trying to deal with issues from their past and have no other way in their "box of tricks" to get help? What if that abuse is actually a subconscious call for help? They are just as much the beloved of God as I am, so who am I to get up in arms over their behavior? Doesn't mean that they were right to do what they did or that they shouldn't face consequences but is it appropriate for me to get emotionally involved in lambasting their behavior? Can I take some time to see the person that God loves within that person?
What if the Beloved of God, say, one of my pagan friends, has been so badly mangled by "the church" that they've rejected "god" and gone looking for a Diety that loves and accepts them? What if the way that I've projected Christ to them doesn't help them get over the mangling they've experienced and what they find is more loving and accepting than the way I've treated them? Which "god" is more in line with our Loving God, their's or what I've portrayed?
What would happen if people would start seeing others around them as the Beloved of God and treating them as God would treat the Beloved? What if that happened in churches, workplaces, out shopping, on the roadways, in schools? What if Christians would treat non-Christians as the Beloved of God? Maybe people would be interested in the God that we talk about?
Just turning thoughts over in my mind...
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Judging
I now drive 1 hour to and then from work. On those drives home at midnight I listen to sermons on the iPod my kids gave me for Christmas so I'd have music with me. It helps me stay awake and provides another person with me, sort of.
One of the sermons I listened to this past week was about the speck and the log. The pastor's interpretation was very interesting because I hadn't heard it explained in quite the way he was explaining it, though it made more sense then most. While I may mangle what he said, I'm going to try to write out what he said, in brief. (It was a 45+ minute sermon. Hard to do quickly!)
First off, he pointed out that whomever is doing the judging is coming from a position of having a HUGE log in their own eye. It reminded me of the story of the woman who was taken in adultery and Jesus saying "whoever is without sin, cast the first stone." No matter how bad we think the other person's sin is, what we've got in our own life is 1000's of times greater than what we see in their life. Looking at our own life and our own sin is much more difficult than looking into other people's lives and pointing out the sins we see there.
Second. The pastor said that the only people who have a right to point out sin in another's life are ones who are in a committed relationship with that person. Not marriage necessarily but in small accountability groups that have been together for a long time, know each other very well, and *have agreed to being open to being corrected by other group members.* If you're judging someone who has not agreed to let you judge them, then you're out of line. The churches of the early church were very small groups where they knew each other intimately so they could easily do this within their groups. That is not so true today in our large churches. And on an on-line group we don't really know the "real" person well enough to make judgement calls because we don't know the whole person, just what pixels we see on our computer screen. That may not be the real person at all.
Third. Any judgements must be made out of pure love. No retaliation. No fear. No self-righteousness. Just humble love for the other person. I know very few Christians who aren't filled with self-righteousness masquerading as humble caring. Actually most people are so full of greed to know the dirt on other people to make themselves feel better about their own sins that they eagerly listen to all kinds of gossip in the form of "sharing about a brother/sister. "
From me: While I've put my own impressions in the 3 points, this is purely from me. I don't like being judged but I used to be very judgemental. When I realized what I thought was Godly love was really my fear coming out self-righteously, I made a conscious effort to quit judging. There is only one person on this earth that I feel I know well enough to judge, my best friend of 20+ years, and I almost never judge her. I've learned to trust the Holy Spirit to deal with any of her issues that bother me. And you know? God is good to deal with her issues as long as I keep my mouth toward her off of them.
If I'm seeing sin in another's life, I've learned to look at myself. Generally I'm judging that other person because I feel crappy about sin in my life that I want to ignore. When I learned that my judging others was a way to cover up my need to do my own self-examination I pretty quickly quit finding fault in another. Frankly, I'm usually too busy doing my own self-examination to do any nit-picking in others now.
Jesus said not to throw stones if you have sin in your own life. He also said to deal with your log before dealing with their specks. To me this message is one of the clearest in the Bible. Take care of your own sin before dealing with anyone else's because anyone who says they are without sin is a liar.
I spend my time judging myself and my own life. I allow God to be God and deal with other people. It's amazing how much brighter and positive the world is now that I'm not acting like I am God's assistant Holy Spirit.
One of the sermons I listened to this past week was about the speck and the log. The pastor's interpretation was very interesting because I hadn't heard it explained in quite the way he was explaining it, though it made more sense then most. While I may mangle what he said, I'm going to try to write out what he said, in brief. (It was a 45+ minute sermon. Hard to do quickly!)
First off, he pointed out that whomever is doing the judging is coming from a position of having a HUGE log in their own eye. It reminded me of the story of the woman who was taken in adultery and Jesus saying "whoever is without sin, cast the first stone." No matter how bad we think the other person's sin is, what we've got in our own life is 1000's of times greater than what we see in their life. Looking at our own life and our own sin is much more difficult than looking into other people's lives and pointing out the sins we see there.
Second. The pastor said that the only people who have a right to point out sin in another's life are ones who are in a committed relationship with that person. Not marriage necessarily but in small accountability groups that have been together for a long time, know each other very well, and *have agreed to being open to being corrected by other group members.* If you're judging someone who has not agreed to let you judge them, then you're out of line. The churches of the early church were very small groups where they knew each other intimately so they could easily do this within their groups. That is not so true today in our large churches. And on an on-line group we don't really know the "real" person well enough to make judgement calls because we don't know the whole person, just what pixels we see on our computer screen. That may not be the real person at all.
Third. Any judgements must be made out of pure love. No retaliation. No fear. No self-righteousness. Just humble love for the other person. I know very few Christians who aren't filled with self-righteousness masquerading as humble caring. Actually most people are so full of greed to know the dirt on other people to make themselves feel better about their own sins that they eagerly listen to all kinds of gossip in the form of "sharing about a brother/sister. "
From me: While I've put my own impressions in the 3 points, this is purely from me. I don't like being judged but I used to be very judgemental. When I realized what I thought was Godly love was really my fear coming out self-righteously, I made a conscious effort to quit judging. There is only one person on this earth that I feel I know well enough to judge, my best friend of 20+ years, and I almost never judge her. I've learned to trust the Holy Spirit to deal with any of her issues that bother me. And you know? God is good to deal with her issues as long as I keep my mouth toward her off of them.
If I'm seeing sin in another's life, I've learned to look at myself. Generally I'm judging that other person because I feel crappy about sin in my life that I want to ignore. When I learned that my judging others was a way to cover up my need to do my own self-examination I pretty quickly quit finding fault in another. Frankly, I'm usually too busy doing my own self-examination to do any nit-picking in others now.
Jesus said not to throw stones if you have sin in your own life. He also said to deal with your log before dealing with their specks. To me this message is one of the clearest in the Bible. Take care of your own sin before dealing with anyone else's because anyone who says they are without sin is a liar.
I spend my time judging myself and my own life. I allow God to be God and deal with other people. It's amazing how much brighter and positive the world is now that I'm not acting like I am God's assistant Holy Spirit.
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