Transparency

There is within people the need to belong. There is also a need to be known completely. Many people join religious organizations so they "belong". Religious organizations would seem like a safe place to not only belong but also to be known. But they aren't always.

Lately I've been spending time in groups where one can belong AND be transparent without fear of reprisals. What is said or done in those groups is kept private. Everyone involved knows that it is safe to voice their issues without worrying about being judged or condemned. To me, that is what church should be like.

Unfortunately I grew up in churches and learned very early on that there was no privacy and a LOT of judgement if anyone broke down and confessed who and what they really were. I listened to the snipping and snipe-ing that went on. The "prayer requests" that were obviously a way to righteously gossip about someone else's ills. I learned not to be real at church but to put on a pretty face, proper behavior, and get along with other people's facades.

I wonder sometimes what Jesus would do in those kinds of churches. He obviously already knew each person's foibles and weaknesses yet accepted each person as a valued child of God. Jesus tended to get angry at those would would make being accepted, known, and belong difficult for people who were honest about their need. So, it makes me wonder how Jesus would act toward the pew people in churches and the leadership in those churches. It's scary to consider.

Submit

I've been thinking about all the churches who have problems with dissention in their midst. (And every church I know of has that kind of problem to one degree or another.) What would happen if pastors started teaching Ephesians 5:21-22 from a different angle?

Ephesians 5:21 says, depending on your translation, "Submit yourselves one to another". It's obviously intended for the church at large so if we tie verse 22 into it "Wives, to your husbands" then you've got church people submitting to one another the way they believe wives should submit to their husbands.

If the church is egalitarian then it will remind them that their submission does not mean that they get to do whatever they want all of the time. They need to find a way to mutually agree on answers and decisions.

If the church believes that women are to be silent in church and obey men, then they've got a whole new way to look at how they treat other church members and their spouses. After all, if the women in the church believe that they should be obeying their husbands, then how can they insist on their own way within the church at large? And if the men believe that women are to always submit to men, then what happens when they find themselves in a "female" position of submitting to someone the way a wife would to her husband?

'Course this also opens things up to even more manipulation within the church since so many women in patriarchal systems manipulate the heck out of their husbands to get their own way rather than just stating it clearly and logically discussing it. Now you could end up with a whole church of people manipulating everyone else to the point of being so dysfunctional that it falls apart and has a church divorce.

But just pointing this out (the church divorce stuff) could be the clue-by-four a church body might need to get the idea of submitting to one another. Maybe.

It could make for an interesting sermon though.

"Please open your Bibles to Ephesians 5. This morning we are going to examine verses 21 and 22.

It is obvious that verse 21 is talking about the church body's attitude toward one another. Each person in the congregation is to submit themselves to one another. How do we do this? Paul provides an example in verse 22 when he tells us to look at how a wife submits to her husband. It's obvious that all church members should model their submission to each other on how a wife is to submit to her hubby.

How do wives submit to their husbands? Whose wants and needs does she put first? What does a husband expect from his wife's submission? These are the things that we are all called to do for one another within this church body.

Men, this may be uncomfortable but it's like being the Bride of Christ. Jesus calls us to uncomfortable places of humility as we become more like Christ. It is as we work to understand the submission we are to have toward one another that we most exemplify Christ's foot washing with the disciples."

Shoot. Might be a good sermon in an egal church too, especially one with in-fighting and back-stabbing. IS this the way Christians should act toward one another? Of course not! We're to be known by our love for one another. Love is shown by putting another's wants ahead of our own and doing our best to ensure that their needs are met to the best of our ability while they work to meet our needs and put our wants ahead of their own. If everyone in the church did that, then there would be more real Christian love and concern expressed, felt, and experienced. Church squabbles would be minor and easily resolved. So would issues within marriages. Open, honest communication and a willingness to defer our wants to meeting another's needs.

So, come on churches!! Lets all act like the submissive women Paul has called us to be!